A Man with One of Those Faces




When they were kids Barry Dodds had told him that when he'd knocked his grada's body over at the wake, it was like being buied under a dozen frozen turkeys.  Mind you, he had also told Paul that groping a woman's breast felt like squeezing a roast chicken.  Come to think of it, that kid had a werd obsession with poultry.

Quick paced. Economical. Cinematic. Very, very funny.  

Paul has "one of those faces", the kind of face that everybody recognizes as someone they know/knew.  He's doing his best to scam his deceased Aunt so her estate will continue to give him a very meager allowance.  He cannnot have a job.  He cannot be in trouble with the law.  He has to do 6 hours a week in volunteer work.  Mess up and all the money that remains goes to a home for wayward donkeys.  I have not actually ruined anything for you here.  This is funny, yes, but it is just a tiny bit of backstory.  You WILL still enjoy the book - and we can all hope that someday we can see the film and say, "The book was better." 

Because, of course it was.

"This is a restricted area.  Who are you?"

The man turned his head slowly and gave Wilson a quizzical look, the kind you'd get off a woman in a bar who was trying to decide if she'd let you buy her a drink or not.  Then he turned back to continue watching the show.  He took an uncomfortably long lick of his ice-cream before responding in a strong Cork accent, "Who the feck are you?"

Wilson took his wallet from inside his coat and flipped it open in one practised motion, which he had in fact practised.

"Detective Wilson, National Bureau of Criminal Investigation."

The man's eyes stayed fixed on teh entrance to Richmond Gardens. 

"Well, I'll be the one-eyed son of a cock-eyed Suzie."

Wilson snapped his wallet closed again.  He'd no idea what that meant but this man was starting to really irritate him.

"And you are?" asked Wilson.

"Detective Seargeant Bunny McGarry, Summerhill.  I'd shake your hand but..."

He indicated his ice-cream, leaving Wilson in no doubt as to his relative importance in relation to it.

The man who was claiming to be Bunny McGarry turned his ice-cream cone through ninety degrees with careful precision, and continued his systematic licking.

"I'd like to see some ID.'

You could whip yours out and look at it again, if you'd like?"


Made you laugh.... 

photo: GOMA Brisbane 2010 - Artist Ron Meuck


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